sigh...

I'm just stressed out.
Again.

These few days/weeks at work have been almost hell.
Kat has left already, and I have to train a new one.
And for three days in a row, including today, I've been slightly reprimanded by David for losing money.
"Already 5 or 6 times you know, *sigh* I don't know what to do. It just keeps happening with you, the past few partners you've been doing with - maybo, kim, katrina and now shan shan. It happens everytime."
"Are you sure or not? You sure? You sure?"
"You just have to be more mature and responsible la."

He keeps suspecting that I stole the money since its been consecutive.
You guys know me, I don't steal money.
And I know I didn't.
But he keeps insisting/questioning ME.
I can't take it anymore.
I can't work in a place when it keeps happening again and again,
And I'm the one being questioned again and again and again like I was a criminal!
I can't take it working there anymore!...

But I don't know what's stopping me from quitting.
Its something like commitment to work I suppose..

The pay sucks,
We don't get extra for working at night and on weekends.
We don't even get ONE free meal.
And we have to bear with the gayboss.
Wth?
And I don't get to see my family,
I don't get to rest properly
Sleeping late, waking up late, eating very little/not eating at all..
Even my health suffers.
And my mind as well - because of all this stress.

It makes me feel really down and tired.
I have to break down so frequently because of all this.

I don't get it,
Alot of sucky things keep happening to me again and again these few months.

I got accepted into NTU, but I somewhat chose the wrong course.
I didn't realize there was a Chem+BioChem course until a few days ago.
And I'm absolutely NOT confident of scoring well in Biological Sciences -
And that's what worrying me.
I don't want to study something that I have to put alot of extra effort in - because its really tough.
I don't even know if I really love biology anymore.
And that's probably because there are so many things to study and remember that its almost impossible :\
I know I just really love chemistry.

Sigh I'm just..I don't know what to say.